


Amortentia

by kcallana



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/F, First Kiss, Fluff, Internalised Homophobia, Video Game: Harry Potter: Hogwarts Mystery, a kind of coming of age tale, amortentia is so chaotic and i love it, and coming out tale, frenemies to lovers, love potion shenanigans
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-17
Updated: 2019-06-17
Packaged: 2020-05-13 11:13:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,285
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19250053
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kcallana/pseuds/kcallana
Summary: Merula Snyde, in a desperate attempt to get a date to the Celestial Ball, intends on slipping a love potion to a fellow Seventh Year boy. However, chaos ensues when the love potion accidentally falls into the wrong hands (or, mouth).





	Amortentia

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to my first AO3 fanfic and first fanfic in like six years lol. Merula & OC are seventh year students in this fic. My OC's name is Andrea Reese just to clear up any potential confusion. Enjoy! :)

Oh great, the Celestial Ball, thought Merula Snyde. In all honesty, Merula would have liked to attend the Celestial Ball. But of course, it was an unspoken rule that one couldn’t attend the occasion alone. She would have to have a date. Ugh. The only boy she ever spoke to in her year was Barnaby, and there was no way he would go with her, not that she would ask him anyway. 

Whether she even wanted to go with a boy was another, more complicated question Merula had been avoiding. She couldn’t help but feel, whenever she looked at boys…nothing. And yet all she ever heard about from her fellow seventh year girls was about how George Madorin was just “so gorgeous”, and gosh, Barnaby is “so adorable” the way he’s so passionate about magical creatures, and let’s not forget about how Jackson Murring is “so handsome” in his Quidditch uniform.  
Boys, to Merula, were unappealing. So far, at least. She was certain that she just hadn’t seen the right one yet. She was certain she wasn’t into…ugh, she didn’t even want to think about the alternative and how unnormal it was. 

So, in her struggles when it came to finding a date to the Celestial Ball, Merula decided on Jackson Murring, the handsome Quidditch player. (She thought he was painfully average looking, but at least having him on her arm would create some jealousy). Of course, she could never just ask him to his face. She had a small doubt that he might say no (unlikely, thought Merula, but possible, considering that she had not been the nicest to him or his friends in the past). But Merula was aware that the class would be making Amortentia in one of their upcoming Potions classes. Ah, how convenient…

 

It was quite easy to sneak some of her well-made potion out of class when Snape wasn’t looking, though a little terrifying. If Snape had have caught her, she doesn’t know what kind of punishment he would choose. But here she was in the Great Hall, waiting for Murring to come sit down at the Gryffindor table (yes, her date to the Celestial Ball would be a Gryffindor, but there weren’t really any desirable candidates in Slytherin. Besides, a Gryffindor and a Slytherin? That would get somebody’s attention), and she would offer him some special pumpkin juice and tell him how much she regretted picking on him and his friends. Of course, this wouldn’t have to go on for long, thank god, because as soon as that love potion kicks in, Murring would fall hopelessly in love with her. Now the potion would only last about thirty minutes, but that was enough time to tell Murring to ask her to the dance. Perhaps she should ask him to do it in writing, that way when the potion wears off, she can prove he asked her. And if he says no? Well, she’s sure she can change that with a jinx or two. 

“Merula?” came an annoyingly familiar voice. 

“Yes?” she asked impatiently, turning away from her potion and towards Penny Haywood. 

“What are you doing at the Gryffindor table?”

“I could ask you the same thing.”

Penny sighed in annoyance. “I’m sitting with my friends.”

Merula looked at the table and saw no Rowan, or Tulip, or Andrea, or anyone from that group.

“What friends?”

“Well they’re not here yet, clearly, but they’re coming. Oh, there they are.”

Both Penny and Merula turned their heads to face the doors of the Great Hall to see Rowan and Andrea making their way down to Penny. Suddenly Merula felt…nervous? She kept feeling a tightness in her chest whenever she was Reese, what did that mean? She wasn’t nervous to see her, why would she be?

Her thoughts were torn away when she saw Jackson Murring and some friends enter the Great Hall, and sit at the other end of the table. In a rush, she leapt from the table and sauntered over to him (desperately trying to ignore Reese), with the intention of asking him to join her at the other end. Wait, she thought, I should have just brought the pumpkin juice with me and joined him at this end. No, then I would have to sit with his friends. She could hear someone coughing obnoxiously in the distance, but ignored it. I’ll head back and get the pumpkin juice, and then just join his stupid friends. 

As she marched back to where she was before, she noticed that the glass of pumpkin juice was…

“Where’s my pumpkin juice?” she asked through gritted teeth. 

“Oh, was that yours?” asked Penny innocently. 

“Was it mine? Of course it was mine, it was sitting right in front of me, you–”

“Merula, it’s fine, I’ll get you some more. Penny gave it to me because I was choking.”

Oh, shit. Of course. Of course, of all people, it just had to be her. The very girl who was making Merula nervous and making her think about girls in a way she shouldn’t and – 

“I have to go.” Merula stated, and hurriedly began making her way out of the Great Hall. The potion should set in in a matter of seconds, and she did not want to be here, or anywhere near Reese, when it did. She was almost out of the Great Hall when she heard her name being called. Stupidly, she turned around, to see Reese following after her. Shit.  
Merula rounded the corner and hid behind the door. Surely this will fool her, when people take Amortentia they practically turn into lovesick idiots, she won’t think to look behind the –

“Well what on earth are you doing behind there?”

Oh, for Merlin’s sake. Merula looked up at Andrea Reese, only to see that she didn’t look normal. Her eyes were wide (and sort of nice to look at) and she was smiling strangely, she looked daft, like…like she had been hit with a love potion. 

“Look, Reese, I have places to be so don’t follow me. Leave me alone if you know what’s good for you.”

“I don’t want to leave you alone, I love you, Merula!”

“No you don’t, you drank a love potion.”

Andrea laughed cheerily. “No I didn’t! I drank some pumpkin juice. Oh, it did smell a bit funny, though. It sort of smelt like new books, you know how they have a specific smell?  
And also sort of like–”

“Leave. Me. Alone. Do you understand? I am going back to my dorm, and you are going back to yours.”

“I’m going wherever you’re going!”

This proved to be true as, throughout this conversation, Merula had been making her way back to the dungeons, and Andrea had been following her every move. They were nearly there when Merula had an idea. There was no way she could make Reese leave her alone, but since they were headed to the dungeons, she could pay a visit to the Potions ingredients cupboard. Merula knew for a fact that Snape had multiple antidotes in there, presumably for emergencies, and she would have to steal one to give to Andrea. 

Suddenly she felt something in her hand, only to discover it was somebody else’s hand in hers.

“What are you doing?” she demanded.

“Holding your hand! I like being near you, don’t you like it?”

“No,” she lied. “I detest every minute of it.” she desperately attempted to shake Reese’s hand out of her own, only for Reese to giggle and hold on even tighter. 

“Can’t we hold hands for just a little bit? Please?”

It was interesting, seeing Reese in this state. She wasn’t angry at Merula for some reason or another, she wasn’t stressing to the near-point of breakdown over finding her brother, she wasn’t sacrificing her own happiness to help someone else. It was…nice, to Merula, to see her like this. This, as in, distracted from everything. 

Perhaps it wouldn’t be such a bad thing to not give Reese the antidote…besides, if Snape caught Merula stealing from the potions ingredients, she might be killed. Then again, Reese has been staring at her for an abnormally long time now, not saying a word. It was becoming sort of scary. 

Antidote it is. 

When they finally reached the dungeons, Merula signalled for Andrea to stay quiet, and made sure Snape was busy in the Potions classroom. He was observing what looked to be fifth or sixth year’s, and looked very focused. She was sure they would be fine. 

Merula unlocked the cupboard quietly, and walked in, shutting the door behind her and Reese. Why did Snape bother locking this cupboard in the first place if everyone could just use Alohamora? Hm. 

“Now look,” Merula warned. “I need you to be really quiet while I look for something.”

“Can I help look, too?” Andrea whispered.

“No, I don’t want you knocking anything over, we both know how clumsy you are.”

“No I’m not!” 

“Shh!”

“Oh, sorry.”

Merula began searching the shelves, Andrea staring at her lovingly and intensely.  
Just as she was grabbing a bottle off of a high self, Andrea gasped, almost causing Merula to drop the bottle.

“What are you doing?!” she whisper-yelled. “I almost dropped that because of you!”

“Can we kiss?”

“…What?”

Did Merula hear that right? Did Andrea Reese just ask to kiss her? No, not happening. Absolutely, no chance, never happening. No matter how cute Reese looked right now. Wait, what was she thinking?

“I said, can we kiss? You know what kissing is, don’t you?” she teased. 

“Of course I know what it is!” she growled impatiently. “And the answer is no. Now shut up and let me-”

“But what if I’m really quiet? Then can we?”

Merula signed in frustration and rolled her eyes at Reese’s childish antics. 

“Fine. If you’re really quiet, and let me find what I’m looking for, then we can kiss. Do you understand? Not a word until I find what I need.”

Andrea nodded, ensuring not to say a word. 

It took a few more minutes for Merula to find the antidote. Thank god she did, this love-sick Reese was making her regular-sick. 

“Alright, drink this.” She removed the lid and held it out to Andrea. 

“What is it?”

“It’s, erm, water.” Idiot, you couldn’t think of anything more convincing than water?

She expected Reese to question her, but she merely shrugged and beamed a smile at her. “Okay.”

But she didn’t take the drink. 

“Drink it.” Merula insisted. 

“Aren’t you forgetting something? You said you would kiss me after I was quiet, and I was. So, now…”

“I’ll do it after you drink this.”

“That’s not what you promised.”

“I didn’t promise anything, actually.”

“Just because you didn’t say the word promise doesn’t mean you didn’t.”

“Yes it does, now drink it!”

“No.”

Merula groaned, unsure of what she could possibly say to convince Reese to drink the antidote. She could try and force her to, though that would probably cause a lot of noise. She could…she could…

“You know, I’ve been wanting to kiss you since fifth year.”

What?

“What?”

“Mmhm. Remember that time when we were looking for the vault…and Rakepick…hurt you?”

“Yes. What about it?”

“I don’t know, I just…after she did that I thought, ‘wow, Merula got hurt all because of me’. And then I thought, ‘I don’t want Merula to be hurt, I want to make her feel better’. And then, for some reason, I sort of felt like kissing you. But I didn’t. But now I always think about it and I still want to kiss you.”

Was this the love potion talking? It had to be. Though Merula had never heard of love potions creating false memories, only altering the current reality. Had Reese really thought about kissing her before, the same way Merula had? She felt a warm hand slowly make its way onto her cheek, and turned to see Reese looking at her lovingly. A part of Merula wished this was real. 

“What are you doing?” she demanded. 

Andrea tilted her head. She looked confused, innocent. 

“I’m doing what I’ve wanted to do since that day in fifth year.”

Should she stop her? She was clearly under the influence of the love potion, she didn’t actually want to do this. Wasn’t it wrong of Merula to let her? Then again, she might have been telling the truth, and she really did want to kiss her. Not that it would mean anything anyway, not that Reese would really remember it. After this, Merula would have to pretend like it never happened. Could she do that?

It was too late to stop her, Merula was afraid that if she tried to speak, nothing would come out. She was afraid that if she tried to move, her legs would turn to jelly. She could barely hear anything, save for Andrea’s breathing. Or was that hers? She felt nervous again, like she usually does around her. Her heart was beating faster than it should, and Andrea was so close to her, with her eyes almost closed and her lips slightly parted. She could smell something familiar, a sweet scent that seemed to accompany the girl in front of her. Did she smell that in Amortentia? No, she couldn’t have.

Andrea’s parted lips were dangerously close to her own, inching closer, and Merula had no intention of stopping her. 

Their lips met in the middle, and Merula was shocked at how good it felt. Andrea’s lips were soft as they pressed against her own, and she occasionally parted her lips, causing the nerves in Merula’s stomach to go crazy. Her hand was still on Merula’s cheek, warm and soft. 

Her hand made its way to Andrea’s waist, gripping her gently, not quite wanting to let her go. She tiled her head, pressing her lips more firmly against the other girl’s, and felt a hand find its way into her hair. She could have stayed like this for ages, despite the overwhelmingly strong sensation of butterflies in her stomach. Maybe it was butterflies all along, not nerves. 

 

It had been four days and Merula had managed, so far, to successfully avoid Reese. After she had given her the antidote, she remembered nothing – like Merula suspected – and so she could continue on with her life without the knowledge that she kissed Merula Snyde in the potions ingredient cupboard. Merula, on the other hand, could not forget.

She had given up on her quest to get Murring to go the Celestial Ball with her. She had had enough of romance (despite never even really experiencing it), and merely wanted to forget about Reese and the stupid lies the Amortentia had made her tell. This was difficult, of course, considering they shared classes, and she desperately attempted to avoid looking at her, but this wasn’t always possible, and the two had a few brief, awkward moments of eye contact. 

So maybe she hadn’t completely avoided her, but she was pretty close to it. And now she just had to do it…for the rest of the year. Fun. 

She was making her way out of the Great Hall after dinner, heading back to her dormitory, when she saw her. Her eyes, for some reason, lit up when she saw Merula. 

“Merula! Are you busy?”

“Yes, Reese, I am.”

“Do you mind if we talk quickly? While you’re on your way to wherever you’re going?”

“I said I’m busy, so no, we can’t talk.”

“It’s kind of important, actually.”

“Goodbye, Reese.”

She got a little further down the corridor, only to hear “Wait!” and the sound of running footsteps. 

Yeah, she didn’t think that would work. She tried her hardest to act annoyed, but in reality she was glad Andrea wanted to talk to her and wasn’t going to ignore her for the rest of the school year. Besides, it was probably about something else, Amortentia victims typically have trouble remembering what happens while they’re under the influence of the potion. Of course, it depends on the strength of the potion, and this was only Merula’s second time making it. 

When Andrea caught up to her, they walked side by side, neither saying a thing. 

“What exactly did you want?” Merula questioned. 

“Oh! Um…well I…”

“You wanted to talk to me so desperately and now you don’t know what to say?”

“Well, I…I don’t really know how to say it.”

What was so hard for her to say that she was suddenly at a loss for words?

“Just spit it out.”

“Did you mean to make me drink a love potion?”

Great, so she did remember. Merula stopped in her tracks, spinning on her heel to face Reese.

“Of course not. It was your stupid friend’s fault that you drank it, not mine. It wasn’t meant for you, and who it was meant for isn’t any of your business.”

Andrea was expecting a response like that. She didn’t really think Merula would handle the situation…calmly. She must be embarrassed that her plan had been interfered with and ruined. In an attempt to continue the conversation so that she could eventually ask what she wanted to, she asked, “Was it a strong one? Like, was I under it for long?”

“Seeing as I’m top of the class in Potions, yes, it was quite strong. It lasted about twenty minutes before I gave you an antidote.”

“What, erm, what was I like?”

Merula sighed, stopping in her tracks once again, before deciding to keep walking, Andrea following her hastily.

“What do you mean, what were you like? You’re well aware of what Amortentia does, aren’t you? You were stupid and infatuated with me.”

They were getting close to the dungeons, and Andrea supposed Merula must be going back to her dormitory. But didn’t she say she was doing something important? Oh, she probably just didn’t want to talk to her. 

“I kissed you, didn’t I?”

This time when Merula stopped, she stayed that way. She glanced around, making sure the corridors were empty, before responding.

“What? I don’t know what you’re talking about, clearly that potion affected your memory more than I thought it would.”

“Look, I’m…I just wanted to apologise. I mean, I know it was the potion making me act that way, but I wanted to say sorry for doing…that…and for making you uncomfortable.” 

This wasn’t exactly what Andrea wanted to say, and wasn’t where she wanted the conversation to go, but she wasn’t sure she could say much more if Merula was so uncomfortable talking about it that she would flat out deny it ever happened. From her memories, she had thought that Merula had maybe enjoyed it as much as she had. 

“Of course it made me uncomfortable,” Merula stated. “I’m not a lesbian or anything.”

She spat the word, harshly, as if just the word itself was hard to say. And with that, she began walking towards the Slytherin dormitories once again. 

“What’s wrong with being a lesbian?” Andrea questioned, following her. She had intended for the question to come out almost as a joke, but perhaps it sounded nervous. She was nervous, after all. What was wrong with liking girls? Was there something wrong with her?

“Are you mad? It’s not normal for people to like the same sex; some people even call it an illness.”

“Like who?”

My father, once, Merula remembered. She was only little. Maybe he’d changed his thoughts since them. Maybe he would change his thoughts if his own daughter –

“Like everyone.” She retaliated. She had reached the Slytherin dormitories, finally, and was just about to utter the password. 

“I think it’s perfectly normal.”

She had never heard someone say that before. She was under the impression that everyone was like her father, that everyone thought it to be strange and unnatural. Perfectly normal?

“Of course you would think that, Reese.” And with that, she entered the Slytherin dormitory, and the door closed behind her. 

Andrea began making her way back to her dormitory in defeat. She secretly hoped no one would be there. She had imagined this conversation going much differently to how it had, but Merula was always so hard to predict. All these years whenever she thought they were friends, she went and did something to make her think otherwise. It was like she didn’t want Andrea getting too close to her, and yet she always maintained contact by sitting next to her in class, or studying with her, or challenging her to a duel. She thought that they were finally on a level where they could have a real conversation about something that was important to Andrea, and instead the whole thing was pointless. 

“You really don’t think there’s anything wrong with it?”

Andrea spun around in shock. She hadn’t even realised that Merula was behind her at any stage. 

“Erm, not really, no.” 

She didn’t respond. She didn’t look like she knew what to say. And neither did Andrea. 

“Anyway, you’re busy, so I’ll…go.” 

Great, so she wanted to talk to Merula, and now she didn’t know how. So she just left. Yeah, that was smart, Andrea. 

“But you have to admit that it’s weird, at least. I mean it’s not really normal.”

What exactly was Merula trying to say? Did she realise that she was insulting Andrea, and was she doing it on purpose? Andrea had spent enough time having this conversation with herself, she didn’t want to have it with someone else. 

“I think it’s perfectly normal, Merula, like I said. I don’t see anything with liking someone despite whether they’re a boy or girl. Whoever says otherwise is…wrong.” She stated, for lack of a better word. “People can like whoever they want, and they shouldn’t have to feel guilty about it.”

Andrea remembers that time in fifth year, after Merula had been hurt. Up until then, she had thought about girls, but not really in romantic way. Or maybe it was, and she was too young to notice. But then when Merula got hurt, because of her, she wanted to comfort her. But why was her idea of comfort to kiss her? That wasn’t normal, she had never wanted to kiss Rowan or Tulip or Tonks when they were upset or hurt. And suddenly she was pulled out of the mess of her thoughts, spun on her heel, and felt a pair of lips against her own. 

Merula was gripping her shoulders, firmly, and Andrea had closed her eyes. She could hear Merula’s strained breathing, maybe she was nervous, or just hadn’t really done this before. Her lips were soft, but firm against hers, so Andrea parted her lips to soften the impact. She found that Merula did the same, and they would part their lips again and again only to meet back in the middle. Her hands eventually found their way up to Merula’s robes, clutching gently at the collar of her shirt. Merula’s grip on her shoulders remained, but softened, and they stayed there a while, basking in the new, yet not new, experience. 

When Merula finally let go of Andrea’s shoulders and pulled back, she looked embarrassed for just a moment before she regained composure. 

“Do you remember what you said, back when you drank the potion?”

“You mean the stuff about fifth year? Yes. It’s pretty embarrassing that I told you that, to be honest.”

“So you meant it then?”

“…Yeah, I meant it.”

“Good.”

“What do you mean, good?” Andrea laughed. 

“Good, because otherwise me doing that would have been stupid and pointless.”

Their eyes met, despite Merula trying her hardest to avoid it, and they looked at one another. Andrea began to smile, and Merula raised an eyebrow. 

“What’s so funny?” she questioned. 

“You’re truly awful at talking about feelings, do you know that?”

“Yes,” Merula growled. “I’m well aware of that, which is why I did that instead. I’m sure you understand what I was trying to say.”

Andrea giggled again. “I think I got it, yeah.”

There was more silence between them. Neither was quite sure how to fill it, what was the right thing to say, whether things needed to or should be made official, whatever that involved. 

“I mean, in case it wasn’t made clear on my part, I…I really like you too, Merula.”

“Really like me? Well, I don’t know if I could say that much for you, but…”

“Shut up.” Andrea laughed, and Merula’s grin turned into an amused snicker. 

Andrea suddenly recalled that she was meant to be doing something, meant to be somewhere…oh, she was supposed to be going to Hogsmeade with Rowan and Penny to help them find dresses to the Celestial Ball. 

“Come to Hogsmeade with me today.” she insisted, suddenly. 

“What for?”

“So that we can get dresses for the Celestial Ball, of course.”

Merula scoffed. “Please, I’m not going to that stupid thing.”

“Not even with me?”

“…With you?”

“Yeah. If you want, that is. I just thought it could fun, maybe, and…well, if you’re not going with anyone else. And I’m not going with anyone else. Do you want to go with me?”

How ironic that, in the end, Merula’s love potion had (somewhat?) been successful in getting a date to the Celestial Ball. Or course, this situation was much better than the previously planned one.

“Yeah,” she smiled. “I suppose that would be nice, going with you.”

And this time, they replaced unsure silence with the meeting of lips.


End file.
